Frequently Asked Questions - Covenant Groups | University Unitarian Church

What is a Covenant Group?: A Covenant Group is a small group of people (8-12) who meet twice a month to share thoughts, feelings, ideas and life experience. Trained facilitators guide the sharing using a prepared topic. The goal is personal/spiritual growth and a deeper connection to the church community.
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Why do we have them?: To foster intimacy and ultimacy, that is, to foster community, bonding, friendship, and mutual support, on the one hand, and on the other to foster an atmosphere in which deeper, heavier, more private questions — issues of ultimate concern — can be discussed. Covenant Groups get their name from the covenants, or mutual promises, that group members make to each other about how they will be together. The groups are also called Small Group Ministry, because members of each group minister to one another.
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How do I sign up?: Get a registration form from a Covenant Group leader, from the registration table set up in Nathan Johnson Hall after services, during sign-up seasons (Fall and Winter), or any time from the church office. Fill it out and leave it in the Covenant Group mailbox or give it to a Covenant Group leader. You can also register online at the Covenant Group Sign-Up Form. We will do our best to find you a group that meets your time and place needs.
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Who can come?: All church members are welcome to join Covenant Groups. Non-members are welcome too, as long as they understand that one of the goals is to become more deeply involved in UUC. Covenant Group members perform service projects for UUC and for the larger community as well.
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Who leads the groups?: Carefully chosen and trained facilitators lead the groups, and meet monthly or more often with the minister in charge. Because Covenant Groups are small group ministry, facilitators must be members of UUC.
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What exactly makes this a ministry?: Covenant Groups exist to enable us to help one another, especially through hard times; to help us examine issues of ultimate concern, like where we came from, and why we’re here, and where we’re bound; and to help us connect to something larger than ourselves. That is the size and shape of ministry.
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How big are Covenant Groups?: Most groups have 8-10 regular members. Groups may begin the year with up to 12. Usually some minor attrition occurs.
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When do they meet?: They meet twice a month from mid-October to early June - sixteen meetings in all. There are groups which meet during the daytime as well as the evening. Each meeting is 2 hours. It may be preceded or followed by a social time.
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Where do they meet?: Some meet in private homes. Some meet at church. Of those that meet in private homes, some meet in the same place each time, and some float from home to home. The ideal meeting place is a quiet and private space, warm and friendly and free of distractions. Special needs are accommodated group by group. Groups generally sit in a circle, with a lighted chalice to signify Unitarian Universalism. One chair always remains empty for the person who has not yet arrived.
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What do people do in these groups?: Covenant Group meetings follow a simple ritual which includes lighting a chalice, reading opening words, reading the group’s covenant, and checking in, followed by a reading of the topic, introduction and questions to stimulate ideas and sharing. At the end, there is a brief check-out, some closing words, and the chalice is extinguished.
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What gets talked about?: Groups talk around a topic prepared by the Theme Team, a group of UUC members who collect ideas for themes, write, edit and publish 16 themes for use during the year. Each Covenant Group uses the same topic during the same time period, with very minor exceptions. A scheduled theme may be displaced by a new one if a significant event occurs, or if one of the minister’s sermons inspires a particularly challenging theme. Themes may be geared to the seasons or to the church calendar. Topics have included tolerance, death, lifelines, fairness, beginnings, doubt and hope.
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Is there anything you don’t talk about?: We try to steer clear of topics that have a high probability of ripping groups apart. Politics is usually downplayed, as are theological disputes, and other similarly controversial issues that invite righteousness and tend to result in seeming winners and losers. Sexual matters are also best left to other venues. We try to remember that we are doing our best to minister to one another.
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Is there confidentiality?: We covenant to maintain confidentiality. Members may take material from non-controversial discussions outside the group, without naming names. Anything of a personal nature should stay within the group, unless the group member specifically states it is okay to tell others. Ordinary courtesy and good sense are encouraged.
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Are kids welcome?: The small group ministry model is appropriate for mature teens and up. Covenant Groups are a place ‘for the shy soul to appear’ and are by definition an adult group. Small children and babies would be a distraction for the adults, who are there for spiritual growth and quiet listening.
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May I bring my partner/spouse?: Partners are encouraged to join different groups so that each may be seen as an individual and experience the group as an individual, rather than as a couple. Some couples do join the same group. There is no hard and fast rule.
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Can we drink and eat?: Yes, if your group decides that is OK. Some groups ‘snack’ while talking, some save it for afterwards. Some do not have any refreshments.
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Suppose I miss a meeting?: Well, life happens, especially when our intentions are the best. Covenant Group members are encouraged to be thoughtful and intentional about attending meetings, because in small groups the absence of even one person for just one meeting really changes the dynamic and the atmosphere of the whole group. Co-facilitators follow up on unexpected absences to assure that everything with the absentee is all right.
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Suppose I don’t feel like sharing?: Silence is fine, and is respected. Sometimes we just prefer to listen, especially when we are new to a group. If you find you are still not sharing after several meetings, then Covenant Group may not be the appropriate place for you. There are many other discussion groups available at UUC.
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How are groups formed?: You sign up on a form where you can select three different time and day preferences. Covenant Central makes the assignments in the Fall (and on-going during the year) based on availability of co-facilitators and applicants’ preferences. A group must have at least 7 members to be viable and no more than 12 at the start of the year. If you want to join in mid-year, fill out an application and submit it to a Covenant Group leader or to Covenant Central. Covenant Groups also have a mailbox at the church.
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Are the groups open?: Yes, each group maintains an ‘empty chair’ to symbolize the openness to adding members as the year progresses. Groups are considered ‘full’ after February 14 because we have found that adding to an existing group late in the year can be disruptive to the original group and the new person does not get a chance to be folded effectively into the group.
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What is Covenant Central?: Covenant Central (CC) is a three person team consisting of two lay members of UUC and one of UUC’s ministers. CC administers the program, assigns people to groups, conducts training sessions for cofacilitators, screens co-facilitators, and oversees the Theme Team. They also provide guidance to the co-facilitators as needed when dealing with situations that arise during the year.
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What sort of commitment must I make?: Groups work best if people actually come for some significant period of time. We ask for a commitment for the full year, realizing that Covenant Group may not be the right fit for everyone and that life happens. We try to make sure the newcomer understands the nature of Covenant Groups so s/he know to what s/he is committing.
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How much does this program cost?: Covenant Groups are ministry and outreach to our community. There is no fee to participate.
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Frequently Asked Questions - Covenant Groups